Baby Talk: My Baby IS NOT Spoiled!

Hey Lovies! 

Let's talk about this very touchy topic of "spoiled" babies! First and foremost, I must admit that this topic triggers me! I dislike the notion that a child, especially an infant under 1, can be, or is spoiled because of how they communicate. It's just not true! 

Albeit, you may agree or disagree with my stance, but let me point out some facts on the subject matter, and maybe those of you who disagree will come around.

How do babies communicate? I mean really...have you ever just sat down and thought to yourself, "How does a baby communicate?". Probably not, Right? Well, I am here to help you answer this ever so elusive question for some odd reason adults don't seem to comprehend.

Babies cry, fuss, kick, coo, cover their faces, and a number of other non-verbal communications, in an effort to express to you, their adult care taker, what they need. Crazy, Huh? 

In the first year of a baby's life, they can generally understand what you are saying, and they can also pick up on tone of voice. So when we ignore them, we are in fact signaling to them that their feelings, and what they are trying to communicate doesn't matter. From the first day of life, we must talk to, and communicate with our babies, if we want them to develop the proper communication skills for healthy development of their speech, and language skills. Doing this early on, we can aide in their successful development in areas such as reading, writing, effective communication of their feelings and emotions, and build interpersonal skills that will be beneficial to them in their childhood, and later in life.

By making baby talk a two-way street, where you as the parent are actively, and emotionally committed to communicating with them in a loving, and healthy way benefits you both. By doing this, you will have communicated to your baby, and sent the message that what he/she is feeling, and trying to communicate matters to you. (*See our blog on effective baby talk.)

So, why is it that so many adults, when they see/hear a baby crying or fussing, instantly say, "That baby is SPOILED!"?

Like seriously? (insert heavy eye roll)

Babies have no other way to communicate their needs, unless like those of us who taught sign language early on, other than a cry, a scream, or a drawn out baby coo in their first few months of life. So, instead of assuming a baby is spoiled, how about we work on our communication skills, and understand how babies communicate to adults? 

I see so many adults just buzzing through life with absolutely no real communication skills, like at all! 

So, with that said let me bring this further into context for some of you. With a post that I wrote when someone expressed to me that my baby was spoiled: 

MY BABY IS NOT SPOILED! 
MY BABY IS HUMAN!

MY BABY IS NOT SPOILED! 
MY BABY CRAVES HUMAN INTERACTION!

MY BABY IS NOT SPOILED! 
MY BABY CAN’T YET SPEAK FOR, OR DO THINGS FOR SELF JUST YET, SO BABY NEEDS ME!

MY BABY IS NOT SPOILED!

So Question ....🤔

If you couldn’t speak, get up and wipe your own butt, feed yourself, walk, come and go as you pleased without the assistance of someone else, how would that make you feel?

How would you cope?

So Tell me something else...

Do you crave human interaction from time to time?
Do you like a good conversation, filled with laughter and love? 
Do you like compliments, and being held close?
Do you wake up at night looking for your partner's warm body to scoot up next to, just so you can go back to sleep?

Well, our babies want the same things! Our babies are of course human after all!

Baby doesn’t want to be written off as a second class citizen, because you got other “Things to do”! Baby doesn’t want to be shoo’d to a closed space, or strapped down in a bouncer cause baby is getting into stuff, and on your nerves.

Your baby is NOT spoiled! Your baby isn’t the problem!

You ARE!

You, of course are an ADULT! Adults are well sometimes, SPOILED! 🤷🏽‍♀️

So my good people, the next time you consider a baby spoiled, look deeper. What is baby really trying to communicate to you when they cry or fuss? It is of course, one of their only ways to communicate right now, and maybe it's high time us adults learn their language! 

We want to hear from you! Leave a comment and tell us about your communication style and how you communicate with your little one.